Goodbye, Mocha. We Deeply Miss You!

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This post is dedicated to our baby, Mocha.

Tuesday night, March 9th, we said goodbye to him. *Sob*

We bought him last Thursday, March 4, 2010. It wasn't from a pet shop. Mocha was a half-breed Bernese Mountain puppy. He was so cute but we were thinking twice about buying him because, first, he was being sold at a very low price, and second, Mai and I weren't sure if we're ready to take care of a puppy who needs a lot of maintenance. But, our desire to take care of a puppy as cute as Mocha prevailed and we brought him home.

As soon as we got home, we tried to play with him but he wasn't responding very well. He preferred to sleep and we just concluded that he needed to rest after days of being held by different people while he was on sale. So, we let him rest but later that night, we tried to feed him rice. The next day, though, he threw everything up. We did some research and found out his breed don't respond well to rice or bread. So, Mai bought him pet food and some dog treats suited for li'l pups like him.

Imagine how glad we were when he started eating. Mai was the happiest and I'm pretty glad to see her protective side. She never knew she could take care of someone like that. It was a realization for both of us.

Mai had sleepless nights ever since we got Mocha. She can't stop thinking if he's doing okay or what. I told her that it'll be better if Mocha would be left to play with Levi, our youngest puppy before Mocha. They were playing along well so we thought it'll be best if he sleeps outside with Levi. We told ourselves we'll just give him a bath on one of our stone sinks at our backyard every week to deal with the dirt he gets while playing with Levi.

Mocha was a very playful pet and just like dogs like him (Bernese Mountain Dog), he was very loyal. He'll run to us whenever Levi playfully bites on his feet or teases him. He'll give us this "Mom, I need help!" look that can melt hearts.

We let him sleep in our bedroom the first 2 nights he was with us. The second night, he won't stay still and Mai had to take him outside because he kept on crying 'coz he wanted to play. We were still sleepy 'coz we just had a few hours of sleep so we had to leave him at our living room to play with Levi.

Mai was very fond of him. Mocha was very sweet. I remember him playing with our slippers 'coz we were busy setting up the cafe. He did that to get our attention. So, Mai picked him up and let him sleep on her lap. I took a picture of them and it's the one on the left. Maybe he saw that Mai was still busy playing so he tried to climb on top of the counter table and he rested his head on the keyboard. The computer was turned off twice 'coz we haven't adjusted the settings yet for the Power and Sleep buttons to do nothing when pressed. It was pretty funny. He liked his place there, close to Mai's keyboard (see photos below).

We had a lot of plans for Mocha. Mai vowed to take him walking every morning, along with our other dogs, as his exercise. We also want to make sure he's only fed healthful foods like Eukanuba dog food, fruits and veggies.

We really thought Mocha's going to have a long life with us. We were even imagining Mocha as an adult dog playing with poor, small Levi who still looks like a puppy 'coz of his genes. We had high hopes. We were happy to take care of him.

Sunday morning, we were rudely awakened by hard knocks on our door. My Nanay told us that Mocha was having a seizure. We thought he's going to die or something. My dad tried to calm him down and made him drink water. Mocha relaxed for a bit and was back to normal. We thought that's going to be the end of it.

We were wrong. The seizures kept coming everytime Mocha's awake. It was the first time for me and Mai to really care for a dog so we didn't really know if we should take him to the vet or just let him be. I asked a batchmate of mine, who's now a vet, about Mocha's situation. She told me to force feed him with soup from boiling rice and Gatorade so Mocha can get back electrolytes he lost from the seizures. She advised us to take him to the vet.

Mai and I are on a tight budget so we weren't ready to shell out thousands for a Vet to check up on Mocha. With what we've heard and read online, most of the people were talking about how their vets charged them Php 5,000 to 30,000 for checkups and procedures/tests done on their pets. Our Mocha was suffering from seizures so we were expecting that we'll be shelling out maybe more than that to cure his seizures.

We did some research online to find out who's the best Vet near our area. When I said "BEST", I meant someone who would really care about his/her animal patients and won't abuse the owners by making them pay too much.

Mocha's seizures continued and we were all agitated seeing him suffer like that. He was a puppy who didn't do anything wrong. He's too innocent and young to be suffering that much. It was painful to watch so we decided to go ahead and take him to the Vet in the hopes that it won't be too late.

Then, we found out about Dr. Lilibeth Cheng from Beterinarya Plus at Maysilo, Malabon City (the address and contact information is listed below this post). I called her up and told her about the seizures. She told me off and was scolding me for not bringing Mocha right away to the Vet. I was shocked, but happy with how she talked to me because I knew she really cared about animals.

And, so, Tuesday morning, we went to Doc Cheng's clinic in Maysilo. Mocha had a seizure as soon as we got there. When Doc Cheng finally checked him up, she said it might be because of ear mites or Distemper virus. Her strong bet was on ear mites because the seizures weren't as continuous as for someone who had the virus. So, she gave Mocha a few drops of ear medication to kill the ear mites. She also said Mocha needs to be confined the whole afternoon so she can monitor him. He was given and connected to dextrose to help him stabilize.

Doc Cheng didn't make us pay for the dextrose bottle because she said Mocha would only be consuming a li'l amount for his size. We only paid Php 880, 380 for the ear medication for all our dogs at home (to prevent the ear mites from spreading), 250 for her professional fee and the rest for the medication and vitamins she gave Mocha during the checkup to help him with the seizures.

We went home with a positive outlook. We really thought he's going to be okay. Mai and I were even planning on what we'll do for him. I told her that since Doc Cheng is still figuring out what's wrong with Mocha (we can't afford any expensive tests like MRI, etc, to find out if the problem is with his brains or has something to do with his genes), we'll just buy him diapers so we won't have to worry about cleaning him up everytime. Mocha poos and pees because of his seizures. It was really painful and heartbreaking to watch but the doctor, backed by our research, told us he's not really hurting but it's very tiring, especially for a puppy like him.

I went back in the afternoon to pick him up. My brother Kenneth was with me. I was really positive he'll be okay because he showed some improvement while he was being checked by Dr. Cheng. However, when we arrived at the clinic, a few minutes after, Mocha had a few more seizures. All my plans and the optimism in me was replaced by pity for him. But, I kept my head up high, telling myself that the medications are not like magic -- it'll take time for him to heal.

Dr. Cheng told us he was having seizures the whole afternoon. I told her the seizures weren't as bad as before. Mocha had a fever and Doc Cheng tried to lower his temperature down. It worked and she just advised us to keep him on dextrose, give him antibiotics and Dilantrin to find out if it'll help stop the seizures.

While we were on our way home, in the jeepney, Mocha was barking. It was the first time I heard him bark without being triggered by Levi playing or teasing him. That made me think that he's doing better. I tried to calm him down and he had another mild seizure. People in the jeep were looking at us and him, all with pity. How could a puppy as small as Mocha suffer this much?! Why?!?! :(

I dropped by the market to buy him diapers. Earlier, Mai and I bought new rugs for Mocha to sleep on. As soon as I got home, Mai wanted to hear what's up. I told her everything and we were both REALLY hopeful Mocha would be okay.

While Mai was preparing our dinner, Mocha started barking at her. She responded by asking him, "Ano?", "Ano yun?" (What? What do you need?) lovingly. She was happy to hear him bark/talk. Now that we're looking back at it, we feel that Mocha was already bidding us goodbye 'coz he can't take the seizures any longer. :(

After we had dinner, Mocha was still doing okay. But, we were shocked by violent knocks by my dad. Mai and I jumped from our bed and answered the door. My Tatay said that Mocha's dead!

I almost fainted when I heard Mocha passed away. I rushed off to his box that served as his bed. He was lying there, lifeless. The dextrose was almost consumed and Mocha's body was swollen. I thought he died because of the dextrose. I woke up my brother, Kenneth, a Nurse, if there's anything he can do. I was in a shock. I was trying to revive him by massaging his chest area. Mai was trying to stop me because there was nothing I can do. We were all in tears. I cannot believe he's gone! We were all hopeful after the checkup with Doc Cheng so I cannot believe what happened.

I was in denial that Mocha's really gone. I was semi-yelling at him, trying to wake him up 'coz maybe, just maybe, he was too weak to breath and just needed something to wake him up from whatever it is he was going through. I couldn't accept that I wasn't beside him or near him when he died. I couldn't believe it, 'til now, that Mocha's gone. :(

After a few more minutes, we all decided to start burying him. We were all crying and really hurting. Mocha's gone. We won't be seeing him anymore. 'Til now, I'm hurting.

All our dogs were awfully quiet that night. Levi, our younger dog who was Mocha's playmate, was walking about while we were around Mocha. We noticed how sad he was, too. He wasn't as playful as he used to be so we told him off so he won't see Mocha's lifeless body. I remember all our dogs howl and bark whenever Mocha goes on seizures. I know they know Mocha's suffering and they all seem pretty sad, especially Stacie, our half-breed Labrador, and Levi, because they got to know Mocha up-close. *Sigh*

Mai didn't take Mocha's death lightly, too. It was the first time for her to really care that much for someone else other than me and her family. She said earlier yesterday that now, she understands what it feels to lose a pet. Before, she used to say that people who cry over losing a pet were over-acting (OA) or were taking it too seriously. She realized, after Mocha's passing, that it's really painful. Mocha was only with us for less than a week so just imagine how much more hurtful it is for owners who had their pets for much longer.

Mocha was only with us for a few days and we only got to play with him for 2 days. 2 DAYS. The rest of the time he was with us, he was already suffering. That's why 'til now, we can't let go. I hope we were given a few more happy days with him before this. :(

I kept on blaming the people who sold Mocha to us. He gave us a sick puppy. I know he knew that. He wanted to make quick money from those sick puppies he's selling, not thinking how much painful it is to take care of a sick puppy and see them suffer like what happened to us when Mocha was having his seizures. I sent him a text message and he denied it saying that Mocha was alive when he sold him to us. Of course, he was! Sheesh. I told him I believe in KARMA. I hope he won't be selling any more sick puppies to anyone else. We weren't upset about the money. We're mad that he don't know how it hurts to care for a sick pet and see them die.

So, in case you're here in Malabon or somewhere in the KaMaNaVa area, don't buy pets from Jomar. He's a small guy, in his mid 40s. He wears a blue cap and he sells Bernese and other half-breed puppies. His mobile # is 0922-223-9774. DO NOT BUY ANY PUPPY FROM HIM. It'll just break your heart.

Even after that, we still are happy we got to meet Mocha. In the short time he was with us, he has shown how loyal and sweet he is. During his sufferings, he showed how strong he was for a puppy. He held on. He knows we were trying our best to make him feel better, to make the seizures bearable. I know he felt loved.

Now, Mai and I are thinking that maybe, just maybe, adopting another pet puppy would help us heal. We learned our lesson the hard way. Next time we adopt or buy a puppy, we'll take him straight to Doc Cheng for a thorough checkup. But, still, I know that we gave Mocha our utmost love and care. We didn't neglect him. Now, our fears won't stop us - fears from listening and reading horror stories from pet owners who were overcharged by Vets or got their pets neglected by the doctors whose main duty was to take care of pets who I consider little humans.

We still cry when we get reminded of Mocha's very short life with us. We try to busy ourselves with other things to just stop thinking about him. It was all too sudden. He was a sweet and loving puppy. I wish we were given at least 1 more day with him. I wish we were given a warning that he'll be giving up. But, I do hope, wherever he is, he knows that we love him so much. He's no longer suffering.

We still love and miss you, Mocha. We will never forget you.

If you have a puppy and you're open to having them adopted by someone else, our arms are WIDE OPEN. Contact me through this blog.

For all of you who have PETS, please do not hesitate to take them to the Vet for checkups. I am strongly recommending to bring them to our vet, Doc Cheng. Here's her clinic's address and contact #.

Dr. Lilibeth Cheng is very accommodating and truly loves pets. She doesn't charge you anything unnecessary. She's got very good feedback from pet lovers like us all over the web. I tell you, you'd be very satisfied with how she takes care of your pet. She might scold you the first time you meet her but that's really her way of showing she cares. Be HONEST with her so she can give your pet her utmost and proper care. Don't hesitate to ask her questions, too. We love her!

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